I did go out briefly. But only for about 2-1/2 hours.

Today was Justin’s company picnic. I look forward to it every year because they do have a nice picnic…rent a pavillion, grill, play softball games, and the place where they go each year includes a water park. I couldn’t go last year because Cooper was just over a week old, so I was not up to sitting in 90+ degree heat with a newborn and post-partum heat-flashes.

This year I was all about it. I even made sure I had a suitable bathing suit…nothing too matronly since I try to be hip, but nothing that might get Justin fired because it got yanked off by one of my kids while playing in the waterpark.

But Cooper has had diarrhea all week. Mild, but still not suitable for public pool situations. And he’s been fussy, so since the pediatrician still saw fluid behind both his ears on Monday (leftover from his ear infection last month), I thought I’d best bring him in this morning to ensure it hadn’t gotten ugly again.

It had.

So since he was already banned from the pool due to the poops, the ear kind of cinched it that I would not be going at all. Which is just as well since Justin and Gavin left for the picnic shortly after I left for the doctor’s office.

Tonight was also the dinner for a friend’s upcoming birthday, so I had a babysitter coming at 5pm. Justin was supposed to drop Gavin by around the same time (or so I thought) and go on to the Rush concert with the Alaskan students he’s been playing ambassador to all week. By 5:20, no Gavin. And no responses to my calls or voicemails to Justin’s phone.

I go to dinner…play fifth wheel to my friends, and have a couple margaritas with my yummy dinner. Uninterrupted dinner. Well, besides when I called Justin two or three more times, and called the babysitter wondering if my eldest child ever showed up.

He hadn’t.

I finish my dinner, socialize a little more, and arrive home a little after 8pm. The house is completely quiet and the babysitter informs me that Gavin just went to bed…literally passed out from all the water and sun and fun he had today. He’d only gotten home an hour prior. I thank her, pay her, try calling Justin again, then started pouring myself some cosmos.

And since I didn’t have anywhere else to go and no husband to impress, I went from this:

including these:

and exchanged it for this (including swapping out my saucy butt-floss for some saggy maternity undies):

I know. Don’t say it. I am one sexy beast in my ratty t-shirt and old strawberry pj pants.

No. This is not some perverted euphemism (although you know I’d be laughing at it). I was on my way to drop off Cooper and was coming up to this stoplight at the bottom of the off-ramp, and saw flashing lights from a cop car. As I got closer to the intersection, I saw on TWO police vehicles on the shoulder of the far lane of traffic. In front of these police vehicles was a huge dump truck and the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile. Unfortunately when I got my new phone in February, I just got another RAZR (for free!) instead of coughing up money for a real camera phone, so you’ll just have to bear with my pictoral witnessing:

You can’t tell in the pictures, but there’s a little bit of damage to the weiner. As you probably already guessed I was laughing too hard to think about going up and around so that I could come up upon the accident closer. Otherwise I’d have much closer crappy pictures.

This morning Justin took the truck, even though I would need it for bringing my cousin, Jill, and her daughter, Meghan, to the airport. Turns out he needed 2 vehicles (our truck and the minivan he was renting) for picking up the students from Alaska and their chaperones, and all their luggage.

Now shoving Jill’s gigantic suitcase, stroller, and Meghan’s infant seat into my car wouldn’t have been a big deal except that I didn’t send Cooper to school because he had his 1-year check-up today (22 lbs 8 oz, and 30.5 inches tall…50th and 75th percentile, respectively), so his carseat needed to remain. And since Justin wouldn’t be picking up the Alaskan group until after 5pm at the airport the OPPOSITE direction of our house, I had to pick up Gavin, so I couldn’t dump his carseat out of the car, either.

We ended up putting Cooper in Gavin’s seat (since he can be forward-facing), putting Meghan in Cooper’s seat, and shoved her infant seat on its side in-between the two carseats. The stroller and suitcase didn’t quite fit in my trunk and we don’t have bungee cords…but we thankfully had some rachet straps that worked out (after Jill and I figured out how to work them…ha ha!)

I really don’t know if the Fire Marshall has jurisdiction over my car, but if he did, I think we were cuttin’ it close.

“My” Meghan…she’s just a few days shy of 3 months old.

I know…too friggin’ cute. Until he popped her in the head twice with that rattle before I could set down the camera and rescue Meghan. He wasn’t jealous…just curious and wanted to touch her. With a rattle.

Cooper sitting with Jill (for about half a second…).

Last night, or rather, way early this morning, around midnight, I realized I forgot to make the mini-cupcakes I was planning to bring for Cooper’s class today. I got sucked into Twitter and Plurk for the n’th time this week and totally lost track of time. I figured at midnight that I was actually getting to bed early for the first time all week…but read Burgh Baby Mom’s post about homemade grilled pizza and thought, “OH CRAP!!!!”

I rushed through a few other computer-related things I needed to finish then went nuts.

• Pre-heated the oven, then saw the fine print on the cake mix indicating non-stick pans needed a lower temp.
• Mixed the eggs, water, and oil with the Funfetti cake mix by hand even though the mix called for an electric because I was terrified of waking up the whole house with my very noisy hand mixer. And I’m a rebel. No really, I am…went to TF South High School, home of the Rebels!
• I put the pan of mini-cupcakes in the oven, then realize I have NO idea how long to bake because the mix didn’t have time for mini-cupcakes. So I got to babysit the oven.
• Got Cooper’s cups of formula made for school while suspiciously eyeballing the rising cupcakes in the oven.
• Wiped down most of the horizontal surfaces in the kitchen. At least the ones not covered by dirty dishes or mail/papers.
• Since I got to babysit the oven, the dang timer went off three times and it is louder.than.sin.

I pulled them out and was arranging them in a dish to bring to the daycare when I heard Cooper fuss over the monitor. I froze…it was 12:30am. A minute later when he was done and quiet again, I realized that I had involuntarily hunched down behind the kitchen island and was holding my breath. I wonder what that says about my parenting. I mean, it made sense a few months back when I was putting some folded clothes away in his room and he stirred in his bed, that I dropped to the floor and crawled out of his room on my belly. A little extreme, but not for a mother tired of a baby getting up twice a night (at that point). Now that Cooper has been sleeping through the night since coming home from Chicago, I get a little testy when he rescinds on our agreement. And apparently it triggers some sort of Post Traumatic Stress response, as well.

The fiftieth time I checked on the little buggers…

No, I did not wipe down my stove…thank-you for asking.

YUM! Actually, I didn’t have a single one. And I did not frost them because while I love the teachers at daycare, I know that they stragetically give the kids the sweet treats at the end of the day, right before parents pick them up.

So I was going to put this cute post here about our DC Bloggers trip to the National Zoo but my dearest darlingest husband scooped me while I was at Target desperately searching for Teething Tablets! WTH? And because I’m lazy and can’t re-write the post I had in my head, you’ll just have to live with the link to Justin’s page (he has pics!).
I will add that I did enjoy our trip, even if Gavin ate more than a hippo and Cooper whined piteously because we were negligent and left his binky in the truck (and by “we” I mean “Justin”). It was neat to put faces to the names (and real names, in some cases). I enjoyed meeting the kids and husbands I had read about and even Justin enjoyed himself. I think he and Caramama’s hubby, Londo, got on famously and may be planning some sort of husband-of-mommy-bloggers date. And while we have like 80 other pictures than the ones posted at Justin’s site, since they contained these other bloggers and their families, we wanted to be sure to respect their privacy. So send a self-addressed-stamped envelope to me with $20 inside and I will relinquish copies of the pictures to you.

Oh, I will leave you with this: should you ever drive to the National Zoo and can’t get a spot in the lot, please please please for the love of Beaujolais, park south (downhill) from the Zoo. Somehow the National Zoo defies all laws of physics and seems to be uphill in all directions. Make it easy on yourself and walk downhill to your car after all that hiking. Your hips and calves will thank you (and me).