After I spent way too long reading and commenting on blogs last night (darn you, you prolific blog writers…can hardly keep up with my uncontrollable urge to comment), I got to bed a little later than I wanted. As I’m trying to doze off, I hear Ginger snoring softly…slightly annoying, but her snores are very quiet for a Boston Terrier and are easy to block out.
About two minutes later, Maggie starts snoring. Now her snores are much louder and I have never been able to fall asleep to her snoring…in fact, I’d swear she was 30lbs larger because of how loud she can snore. I’m annoyed because I can’t reach her with my foot to give her a good nudge. And I’m annoyed because her snores are alternating with Ginger’s…
SNOOOOOORRREEE GURGLE SNORT
snooooorrreeee grumbly snort
SNOOOOOORRREEE GURGLE SNORT
snooooorrreeee grumbly snort
Then, for lots of fun and my utter enjoyment, Justin* starts in. But his snore is a weird syncopated rhythm, presumably due to his allergies, or his innate and uncontrollable desire to drive me crazy, even while he’s unconscious. And I can’t sleep through his snores either, since they’re RIGHT IN MY EAR!
SNOOOOOORRREEE GURGLE SNORT
snoooorrrreee sNOOOOORRRrrrtt
snooooorrreeee grumbly snort
snoooorrrreee sNOOOOORRRrrrtt snoooorrrreee
SNOOOOOORRREEE GURGLE SNORT
snooooorrreeee grumbly snort
snoooorrrreee sNOOOOORRRrrrtt
And just when I thought I finally dozed off, Cooper squawks in his sleep, which jars me awake. Dogs and Justin? Still snoring. And I should’ve known that just because Cooper has been sleeping through the night for about a week (now that he’s mostly over his cold), that he feels compelled to shake things up and starts fussing at 5am. I stumble in there, sneak around the head of his crib so he can’t see me and sliiide that binky in his mouth. He quiets down and I go back to bed, where Maggie has stolen my spot. I shove her over and climb back into bed. Forty minutes later that child is up crying again. I wait…but when he starts shrieking I get up and go back in there. I rock him in the chair and he gets MAD!…screams louder, and I’m sure if he could speak, it would be something along the lines of “DEAR GOD, WOMAN! I’M STARVING! GIMME FOOD!!!!!!!” Not wanting to wake up Gavin, I give in and feed him (don’t care if Justin wakes up, since he’s gotten up with Cooper TWICE in his life. Okay…maybe three times). Once he’s fed and passed out, I stumble back to bed, see that it’s already 6:15am and jump in the shower. I haven’t been up and showering that early in the morning in a while…figure I might actually get out of the house early for a change.
Yeah, I was wrong.
*to be fair, Justin doesn’t have a smooshed face like my dogs, well, except when it’s smooshed in the pillow
6 Comments
I hate nights like those. I do NOT miss babyhood and all the sleepless nights.
Staying up late blogging is just plain my fault.
Why do the animals and husbands always choose to snore loudy at the same time???!!!
I stay up and comment way too late as well. Oh, as for the snoring this is why we have guest rooms, with doors that close! 🙂
LOL…Loved this post….I peed myself laughing….
I am wondering though if my husband outsnores your whole crew……
My husband has just recently started snoring really loudly and these days I’m desperate to get to sleep before he does.
I feel your pain in so, so many ways. Really, you can’t imagine. The Bulldog snores so loud that it actually sounds like a Harley is rumbling in the house (it’s that smushed face thing) and when the husband joins in, it’s not pretty. At all.