Wild and Crazy (Not So) Newlyweds

BTW, the garter thing was ALL Justin…he just kept pulling things out of his jacket while using my gigantic puff-ball dress as cover. His friends kept saying “she’s either going to be REALLY PISSED or laugh her head off.” Luckily for him I found it hysterical, and watching our friends/family laugh their heads-off was well worth the banged-up shins from him bumping my legs with the crowbar until he finally “removed” it from my dress. I need to find the non-photographer shots, you know, the ones from my mom and aunts and stuff…those ladies got better shots of the contraband in my dress (well his jacket) than the guy I was paying. If memory serves (and Justin, be sure to chime in), he “pulled out” a comb, handcuffs, a slinky, a squirtgun (I think), the crowbar, and finally the big ol’ granny panties.
We actually had a lot of crazy stuff going on at our wedding, now that I think about it. My uncle took a wrong turn, and my grandmother, who could barely see, was hollering at him that he turned the wrong way (we waited for them to arrive to start the wedding). There was the cake in alternate faces, the crazy garter-toss, my one little cousin danced with me like 8 times during the money dance, a ton of family drama (including one gal coming out to her parents in front of her guy date…she’s now married with kids, so we call her a Hasbian), when they introduced the wedding party my cousin (Maid of Honor) was partially on the back of our friend (Best Man), but since she couldn’t put her drink down, she nearly fell on her head (and she proceeded to steal his drinks the rest of the night), and I made a rule to visit a few people specifically (like elderly guests, etc), but after that, I was a dancin’ fool! Anyone else have a ton of craziness at their wedding they’d like to share?

So anyways…what did we do for our anniversary?

Friday night my Mom and Stepdad were gracious enough to watch the kids so that Justin and I could go to Bonefish for dinner. We scarfed-down our food in record time, I think due to habit from trying to eat while wrangling two kids, and thought, “let’s go see a movie!”

So we called my parents and they were cool with putting the kids to bed so that we could see a beautiful film with an incredible story and fantastic camera angles: You Don’t Mess with the Zohan.

What? You guys think I have the time or patience for some real cinematic creation? Heck no! I love Adam Sandler flicks, and with my Religious Studies background (and my desire to get my graduate degrees in Mid-Eastern studies), this movie was a shoe-in. It did not disappoint. While we sat in that packed theater on opening night with 700 teenagers, us and two other “adult” couples laughed our butts off! I honestly laughed the whole way through. And even though John Turturo gets second billing, I think it really should be hummus. Or Adam Sandler’s cod-piece.

On our actual anniversary, we battled with the kids, ate a quick (but fancy!) dinner of salmon steaks and sauteed squash, cleaned poop off of Cooper’s back, cleaned the litterbox, (Justin) worked on work-stuff, I finished up some laundry, and we went to bed a little early because we were so tired from being back at work after being off for a few days. OH, and Justin got some stellar anniversary cards and one of them new-fangled digital picture frames (got it for SUCH a bargain!) and I got some gorgeous roses at work to make my co-workers jealous.

About the Author


This is a blog where I will share my adventures and mundane tasks as a work-out-of-home-mom. I now have 2 kids and my wonderful husband, so the juggling has gotten a little bit more tricky (man-on-man defense). We also have 2 dogs and 3 cats (we used to have 4) so as you can imagine, our household is pretty busy. Since I never feel like I'm being listened to, I figured I'll just start talking at the general Internet community and see what happens.


Tranny Head

Dude – my wedding was way more out of control than yours. My poor Southern Bell mom was scandalized as the following took place at the black tie affair:

1. one of my bridesmaids passed out during the service from locked knees. She staggered forward towards me in the middle of the service and the groomsmen thought she was going to profess her undying love for my husband in an effort to stop the ceremony. I caught her before she hit the ground and my dad had to spring into action to haul her away.

2. At the reception at a pre-bellum mansion with a spiral staircase, one wasted deuce and a half sized woman fell . . down the spiral staircase . . . and took out several more deuce and a half sized women on the way down. It was hawt!

I thought it was all hilarious. My mom who footed the bill? Not so much.


Sounds like a wonderful anniversary celebration. The day itself sounds like what our special occassions are now like.

And your wedding sounds so fun!

Burgh Baby

Sounds like you had a great anniversary! Yay for time alone with Justin, even if you did waste it watching that movie. 😉


Funny! I want fun things like that to happen at the weddings I photograph!
I, too, want to see Zohan. I love movies I can just laugh through.
Your wedding pictures are beautiful! What a dress!
Happy Anniversary!


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