Fire-Puking Dragon

While this pregnancy has, in a way, been considerably easier than my last two, I’ve definitely had a much longer bout of morning sickness. It started sooner (right about 6 weeks), and even did a fancy time-shift going from wake-up to 3pm nausea to 4pm-10pm nausea. This has made cooking dinner very challenging as most cooked foods send me screaming from the kitchen. But the real pain has been the unrelenting, hellacious heartburn.

I’m sure it’s not helped by the fact that I battle my evening sickness with citrus fruit salad, high-fat cheese (smoked gouda!!!), rich baked goods (cheese danishes), and spicy food. And I mean spicier than I would normally eat non-pregnant. Granted, I’m a bit of a wuss when it comes to spicy foods, but still…I’m now eating foods that make my nose run and make me sweat.

Unfortunately the heartburn doesn’t seem to respond to Tums, and only seems to get marginally better with ice cream or San Pellegrino sparkling water. Don’t give me no crappy metallic-tasting Perrier…it had been be that Italian stuff or nothing.
I digress.
Nothing really seems to help the heartburn, even without fanning the flames with my anti-nausea weapons. In fact, it seems to have slowly crept up my esophagus, into my throat, and after a few weeks, I swear it is burning the roof of my mouth. Which doesn’t help my citrus or spicy habit.

I’ve also been extra crabby, brought on by sleep deprivation, a sore back, and Justin being out of town again. Add in kids that have been extra whiney and a fairly heavy homework load for a five year old this week, and you have the makings of a pregnant Dragon Lady.

So this afternoon when I sneezed? For half a second I wasn’t sure if I would sneeze out puke or fire. Neither were appealing, though for some reason, sneezing flaming puke got me laughing at myself while I sat in my dark little cube.

Guess I should add the qualifier “crazy” to the title, eh?

About the Author


This is a blog where I will share my adventures and mundane tasks as a work-out-of-home-mom. I now have 2 kids and my wonderful husband, so the juggling has gotten a little bit more tricky (man-on-man defense). We also have 2 dogs and 3 cats (we used to have 4) so as you can imagine, our household is pretty busy. Since I never feel like I'm being listened to, I figured I'll just start talking at the general Internet community and see what happens.



No, because I also think that would have been hysterical, and quite bloggable. 🙂

Hope you feel better soon!


Jenni would pop Tums like they were pieces of candy, I think we went through 3 of those 750 tablet bottles worth. Hope it gets better soon, and at least when you sneezed you didn’t have to worry about where it would exit. Imagine fire at one end, and puke at the other. 🙂

I’ll leave now.


Ah yes, I had heartburn so bad I could spit fire, too. Wish I had suggestions beyond what you’re already doing!! Hope it settles down soon 🙂


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