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Letters While Driving 3? 4?

don’t know….don’t care…too lazy to look….

Remember this guy?

Dear Previously Half-Nekid Construction Worker Wandering Aimlessly Near My Sons’ Daycare:

Glad to see you’re back working wandering after a brief cold snap. Also noticed that you are taking advantage of this morning’s balmy 40-degree weather by wearing an extraordinarily filthy waffle-weave “long john” shirt under your bright green safety vest. I can’t wait until tomorrow to see if you reenact “Suns Out, Guns Out” to best enjoy the 50 degrees we’re forecasted to have.

Best Regards,

A Concerned (about my children’s retinas) Driver

Dear Bright Yellow Aveo:

I love your little, itty-bitty, Lemonhead on wheels. What I do not love is when I am driving behind you, trying to run the light the same color as you, and you ssssssllllllloooooooowwwwww dddddddooooooowwwwnnnnnn to about 10 miles an hour through the intersection. I would think that if you’re going to slow down that much that you would just stop for the light…but you politely waited until you were halfway across the intersection to jam on the breaks. Not sure why, unless the grading in the road to keep it from flooding was too high a hill to handle in a high gear? Maybe you were breaking for the railroad crossing a half-mile ahead? I mean, you are the same color as a school bus.

Sincerely,

The Car that Nearly Pushed You Through the Intersection

Dear Freakish Amounts of Jaguar Drivers in One Area of Virginia:

Um, you are not the good Lord’s gift to drivers and cars. In fact, you are simply a souped-up Crown Vic with a kitty glued to the front of your car. Somehow all of you drive like crazy maniacs around those of who lack the cat. Maybe you’re trying to figure out how to drive in such a way as to shake the cat off your hood?…that’s about what it looked like. Otherwise, I’m guessing that the three of you are in a Club and thought hot-rodding at 9am through rush-hour traffic was fun and appropriate. Thanks for the heart-attack.

Warmest Regards,

One of 50 Other Drivers Out to Skin Your Cats

About the Author

Colleen

This is a blog where I will share my adventures and mundane tasks as a work-out-of-home-mom. I now have 2 kids and my wonderful husband, so the juggling has gotten a little bit more tricky (man-on-man defense). We also have 2 dogs and 3 cats (we used to have 4) so as you can imagine, our household is pretty busy. Since I never feel like I'm being listened to, I figured I'll just start talking at the general Internet community and see what happens.

3 Comments

Karen

And that is why I don’t enjoy cities. Traffic is a beast here when the tractor won’t pull off into a field already.

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Burgh Baby's Mom

Have you ever looked at the depreciation rates on a Jag? Those people are just trying to make up for the fact that they just threw thousands of dollars away for nothing. OR, they bought it used (for nothing) and are trying really hard to convince the world that they are cooler than they really are.

I love these posts, by the way. Keep ’em coming.

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